The Wedding and the Hurricane :: Portraits and Cocktails

Have you read part two of our wedding story? Now let's get on with part three.

After the ceremony was complete, we invited guests out onto the balcony for some cocktails and a chance to mingle. The sky was getting darker and we knew we wouldn't have much time, but thankfully luck was on our side in so many ways. Especially when I had the foresight to make a bestie out of someone who has built a career around the theater - so when I said to Morgan the day before the wedding, "hey, would you mind being MC? I don't really know what to tell you to say. You don't mind, do you?". Whether she minded or not, she totally nailed it! She's such a pro.

I feel like we only chatted to guests for about three minutes before I felt a little drop of rain. We had such grand plans for our reception, there was even a snowcone machine where people could make their own boozy snowcones! But I knew that if we didn't get our pictures done and capture the memories around my grandparents property, I would never forgive myself. 

I asked Olivia what she thought and she reckoned it was a good idea to get going, so though I never got to finish my bubbly I think the pictures we got were totally worth it. And really, stormy skies are way better for photos than brilliant sunshine any day - yet another reason that the approaching storm was actually a blessing. 

Let's face it, taking our wedding photos was always going to be a bit of a silly affair, wasn't it?

See that photo up there, the one of Adam and I dancing on the lawn? Only a few hours before that lawn was set up for a dinner for 68 people. Tents, lights, a dance floor, the tables and chairs were up... everything was ready. But tropical storm Fay had other ideas. 

Ok, I know this is super embarrassing, but I used to sit on this dock when I was little, blasting Backstreet Boys "The One" and dreaming of the man I would one day marry. I think I'm a lot more sentimental than I would like to admit sometimes.

By the time we got back up to the house, most of our guests were gone. Many of them said if they hadn't known we had planned on a different sort of wedding day, they would have assumed it was always meant to be like this - but many of them were still carrying bathing suits, as we were meant to have a post-wedding midnight pool party. But instead of ushering guests down to the lawn, they all had to hop into taxis and drive across the island to a new venue. 

Tomorrow is the final part of the story. There's lots of dancing to Taylor Swift, midnight adventures and all the destruction that occurs when an island prepares for a tropical storm when what is actually heading their way is a hurricane. 

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The Wedding and the Hurricane :: the Ceremony

Did you read part one of this story? You did? Ok good. On to the rest...

By the time the actual ceremony came around, Adam and I had already been through the most stressful part of the day. With a last minute venue change and all the organisation that required, getting married seemed like kind of no big deal. 

We were so lucky in that the storm stayed off the island long enough for Adam and I to actually get married at my grandfathers house - the whole reason why we wanted to get married in Bermuda in the first place! The area we had chosen for our ceremony is a little outdoor courtyard, and if it had started raining we all would have been soaked. I didn't think about the fact that it could start pouring at any minute, I just kind of went with it.

I was pretty nervous walking down the aisle. Months of work and preparation, the events of the day, everyone's hard work - all of it was going into this one moment and while I wasn't freaking out, my mind was buzzing.

But I had to concentrate on not falling down the stairs, and by the time I got to Adam and saw how nervous he was, I calmed down. I made sure I took time to look at everyone who was there, and really remember the moment. Sylvia, a family friend from when we lived in Bermuda all those years ago, married Adam and I and it was such a comfort to have someone there who we were comfortable with and who knew us. 

I love that last photo of Eve, Sara Jane and Katie looking all emotional! The skies continued to darken all day, but I'm happy to say that our ceremony and cocktails afterwards weren't rained out. And we managed to have our wedding photos taken before the storm came through! They're the best part too, and I can't wait to share them tomorrow!

Oh and also, my mum did this reading, and Sara Jane read a passage from Lemony Snicket :)

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The Wedding and the Hurricane :: Before the Ceremony

The day of the wedding I was too nervous to stomach anything but a mint chocolate chip milkshake. Probably because I hadn't yet finished writing our table settings!!

I am beyond excited to start sharing the photos from our wedding!! I hope you don't mind photo overload because I find it impossible to commit to being subtle and selecting just a few. And also, our wedding day comes with a long story, so I feel like I need to paint you a full picture. 

When Adam and I started organising our wedding, the one and only decision I made with absolute certainty throughout the entire process was who I wanted to be our photographer. Olivia Rae James is pretty much my dream photographer! She's always been such an inspiration to me and she shoots weddings so beautifully - it had to be her. If only I could have been so decisive with everything else... 

The entire week and a half that I had been in Bermuda before the wedding, the weather had been so beautiful. Bright and breezy days, clear nights with a full moon, stars as far as the eye could see, exactly the kind of weather you would want for your wedding. My mum and I kept on saying, "if the wedding was tonight, this weather would be perfect" - who knows, maybe we jinxed it. 

A few days before the wedding, our caterers came over for a last minute look around and planning session. They said they had been tracking the weather and there was a 90% chance of rain the evening of our wedding, we should probably go ahead and put up tents. I was sad because I had pictured a beautiful, open-air dinner with lights strung between the palm trees and the tree frogs peeping away in the background. I find it funny now to look back and think about how I was a little sad about the tents, because in the end we didn't actually need them!

The morning of the wedding I woke up, saw how grey the sky was, and declared I wasn't getting out of bed until the weather had improved it's attitude. Adam went off to have coffee with his parents and came back at around 8:30 and sat on the bed next to me. I rolled over and honestly by the look on his face I thought someone had died - it was one of those "just tell me!!!" moments because he couldn't get the words out. As it happens, we didn't need the tents because our caterers had to take them down. There was a tropical storm heading for Bermuda and they weren't insured to have tents up in such high winds. Because of the placement of the tents, there was a good chance that the wind could pick them up and blow them straight through the windows of my grandfathers house. The location we had been planning and decorating for months was just not an option anymore. We needed to change venue...

Suddenly everything went crazy. Our caterer was on his way to pick us up and take us to a venue he could offer us on short notice. My mum was on the phone to Morgan, my maid of honor, and Eve, Sara Jane and Kate, my other bridesmaids, to come over as quickly as possible. Groomsmen arrived on an army of scooters and started to stuff decorations into plastic bags to move them. The alcohol that was taking up most of the garage had to be sent back. The tents were being taken down along with the lights and speakers. It was all organised chaos and I was just in shock, I didn't know what to make of it!

When we saw our new venue, I didn't really take any of it in. Thank goodness we had hired a wedding planner to help with coordination on the day because she was already at the venue when we arrived and immediately jumped in and started negotiating for all the extra benefits she could get from the manager. 

Looking at these photos, you would never be able to tell, would you? We all look so happy and stress free, like we had planned on the tropical storm all along! As I was getting ready and putting my dress on, I completely let go of everything. I wasn't in control of anything anymore and there wasn't anything I could do. Every time I thought of something and said, "MUM!!! WHAT ABOUT THE....", she just said "it's already done". What a superwoman. 

Adam and I decided to have a "first look" before the ceremony. Neither of us could take any more emotion than we had already had to deal with that day. If we had to see each other for the first time walking down the aisle I don't think either of us could have held it together. As it is, I think we did pretty well! I'll carry on with the story tomorrow...

Wedding Dress and Bridesmaid Dresses :: BHLDN, Gold Orchid Hair Ornaments :: Twigs & Honey, My Shoes :: Kurt Geiger, Wedding Rings :: WeAreArrow, Adams Suit :: Suit Supply, Adams Tie :: The Bay

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We all Start as Strangers

This is why I love blogging so much, it just acts as a magnet to bring like-minded and simply wonderful people into your life. A couple of weeks ago I met up with Rocio who was over visiting from Mallorca with her husband.

I've met Rocio before when she came to meet me at work and we went for a coffee around the corner from my office. One hour just isn't enough when you're meeting one of your favourite bloggers for the first time, so we decided to catch up next time she was visiting.

We did Brick Lane from top to bottom, Columbia Road, Hackney City Farm, and then home for tea and Molly cuddles. I love introducing Molly to people who have read about her on the blog because she doesn't disappoint, she loves everyone like they're her long lost relative.

I will always be so grateful to this little space of mine, it has brought me so much joy and so many new friends and experiences. 

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How to :: Deal With Difficult People

{from}

Sometimes life throws you together with people who really get you down. I've never really had much tolerance for problems I can't solve. If I don't like something I cut it loose and leave it behind, or I change it. But I can't just sit with it, because it's all I can focus on and think about. I'm not so good at just letting stuff go, I'm a problem solver. It's just who I am.

But what happens when the problem can't be solved? You're stuck with it, or someone, and you just have to deal. The solution doesn't rest in your hands to make a change, and you just have to... live with it. 

The idea of just 'living with it' gives me the shivers, but that's just life. You can't control everything! So I've come up with some plans for making peace with people or things that you are just stuck with.

1 :: Remind yourself it isn't forever. Chances are the situation will pass eventually, even if it's weeks, months, or years. It isn't forever. 

2 :: Remind yourself that you're aiming to make peace with it. Every day, ten times a day if necessary, say "this is out of my control, I can't do anything to change it, it is not my responsibility". Just remembering that there isn't anything you should be doing helps to alleviate some of the frustration and pressure.

3 :: Remind yourself that there may be more to the situation than you are aware of. There may be contributing factors that you don't know about, that if you did, may make you feel differently. You can't know everyone's story, so try a little compassion, even if it's hard... so, so hard.

4 :: Remind yourself that you may unwittingly be feeding the situation with your own insecurities. As much as it pains me to admit it, I'm starting to believe more and more that the traits that frustrate us the most in other people, are the ones that we dislike most in ourselves. That doesn't at all mean you should blame yourself, but I think there's a lot of sense in taking some time to really think about why this person, thing or situation is really bothering you.

5 :: Remind yourself that you're a good person, and you do good things. This one has helped me most of all. If I repeat to myself that I'm a good person and I try my best, it really calms me down. Sometimes I forget that the solution doesn't always rest with me, and because I'm unable to solve the problem, I'm failing myself.

6 :: Minimise the time and interaction you have with the person that's bringing you down. This might seem obvious, but sometimes annoyances can make you confrontational, and that means you invest more time and energy hammering away at a problem you can't change. If you have to have this person or problem in your life, minimise the contact.

Have I missed any tips? How do you deal with difficult people. 

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