One Day :: I Dream of Having a Family by Amy

Today I'm bringing back One Day! Not that it went anywhere, but it's been a long time since I've posted a One Day post that I thought it was about time, especially as I have some really great ones to share with you! If you're unfamiliar with this series, you can read what it's all about here.

I love this post because it talks honestly about a very personal, but very popular topic of starting a family and the troubles that can sometimes go with it. So I am very pleased to introduce you to Amy, who blogs over at Shareperspective.

I’m Amy. It’s sometimes hard to know how to introduce myself, but I’m most happy when I’m with my family, friends, and my dog, Jamie. I love Freya’s philosophy at Nishaantishu of learning to be ‘in love with your life’ and I really enjoy hearing different people’s ideas about living life to the full. I blog about this at shareperspective.wordpress.com.

If each day is a snapshot into our lives, to get a full understanding of ourselves we need to see a whole album’s worth of days. Ourselves at different points, in each one our future steadily unfolding. For me, every day is different, bringing new challenges and new blessings, but in each one I find out more about myself and who I want to be. It’s like discovering more of my own story.

My life in snapshots would be like many other people’s – there would be highs and lows, the ordinary work-eat-sleep days, days alone, days surrounded by friends. One day you’d see me, a young girl, running after my cousins and brother and shouting back to my sister as we ran through the abandoned quarry at the bottom of Box Hill. Another day you’d see me at my wedding, dancing to the songs I selected and laughing at my dad’s moves. One day, you’d see me standing on the roof of a multi storey in Peckham that had been transformed into a bar, the sounds of people drinking and talking around me. Another day, you’d see me standing in my classroom on the top floor of an old Victorian school, looking out across the city wondering how to enable an eloquent, confident young boy to write more than a couple of sentences. Another day, you’d see me at the end of my tether, without any clue as to how to get the desperate 17 year old in front of me to join her friends in the youth group minibus to go home. There would be countless more snapshots, each one reflecting the experiences that have moulded my thinking, my feelings and my hopes as they are now.

I imagine that one day, in the future, my husband and I will have a child, or maybe even more than one. I can picture first walking days, first-day-at-school days, school prom days. I dream of a time when I will watch another person’s future unfold before me, day by day, seeing them step into their own story.

At the moment, this dream seems far off. We’ve been trying for a baby for a while, but still the days roll by and sometimes appear to bring only the pain of disappointment. But even these days are not empty ones – I’m finding out that each one holds promise if I look for it, even if not in the ways I imagine or plan. So I’m resolving to live, one day at a time, with eyes wide open, hopeful of where the day, with all it’s heartaches and joys, will take me.